"I'm so tired of pretending everything is fine."
Kesha has opened up about her new album 'Gag Order' and revealed she shares 'a lot of bad feelings'.
On "Gag Order," due May 19, Kesha teamed up with Rick Rubin on production to create an "anti-pop" record.
"An artist does not exist to make others happy. I believe that an artist gives voice, movement, color to the feelings we all have. The good feelings and the uncontrollably unhappy,” Kesha said when she announced the album last month.
So far Kesha has released two songs from 'Gag Order': 'Eat The Acid' and 'Fine Line'. Both songs refer to, among other things, the singer's high-profile legal battle with producer Dr Luke.
In a new interview with the Guardian, Kesha said of 'Gag Order': "With this album I've really been able to get very personal and reveal sides of myself that I'm not the most proud of."
"The ones I never want to talk about, that I don't want to share with the wider public. The ones that are scarier, more vulnerable and more insecure. I share a lot of bad feelings on this album,” he explained.
Kesha also confessed that at the beginning of the album's recording process, she would go into the studio and "for about two hours cry" while Rick Rubin was just "making space."
“He never once asked me to stop crying or to pull myself together. It just took me a minute to put a voice to these really unpleasant, disturbing feelings,” she said.
“I don't want to be seen as weak, or confused, or unhappy, because overall in my life...I feel all the emotions. "Sometimes I'm incredibly happy and then I have panic attacks," she described.
"This is the truth. I'm so tired of pretending that everything is fine," the singer emphasized.
Kesha admitted she was "doing her whole existence an injustice" by pretending everything was fine: "As the woman who wrote 'Tik Tok' and 'The Party Don't Start Until I Walk In,' I didn't think anyone needed or he wanted that side of my soul,” she said.
"The whole thing about this album is, 'Some things aren't okay, and I've been through some things that aren't okay,'" he continued.
'Gag Order' is set to be released by Sony Music's RCA Records and Dr. Kemosabe Records. Luke.
In 2014, Kesha filed a lawsuit against Dr Luke accusing him of physical, sexual and emotional abuse. The producer denied all allegations and countersued Kesha for defamation and breach of contract.
The trial of the case is expected to begin on July 26.
“I'm always aware of the ongoing litigation, even when I'm just telling the truth about how I feel. Hence the title of the album," Kesha said of "Gag Order."
